Client Results
Destin Gerek is a sexologist and men’s sexuality and masculinity coach. Below, in their own words, men describe what changed through his private mentorship (online and in person), his 13-week Sexual Self-Mastery (SSM) program (formerly called Orgasmic Mastery), VIP Day intensives and retreats. The changes include ending premature ejaculation, lasting longer, reconnected marriages, body confidence, healing, and a clearer sense of purpose. Names are shortened, and some are pseudonyms, to protect client privacy.
From sexual scarcity and the edge of divorce to a reignited marriage
“A trusted friend had suggested Destin could help me through my struggle with sexual stamina and performance, and in the process build up my self-confidence. My relationship with my wife, Eve, had stagnated. We were on the verge of divorce. Now, six months later, did I get what I was looking for? In short: Yes, and my sexual “performance” was only the starting place on my path to finding the passion and purpose I’d been missing my entire life, despite being “successful” on paper. … I learned about sound, breath, movement and visualization to gain both greater control and more pleasure. … I was able [to] pleasure her in ways I never imagined, with more stamina, confidence and playfulness than ever, over several hours of intense lovemaking. My life has changed. I am a different man today than the man I was six months ago. … As I shift from scarcity to abundance, from insecurity and shut down to confidence and communication, from victim to opportunity… The world of possibilities is opening up in front of me. … Before we began our work, my life lacked passion, purpose, confidence, commitment, self-trust, and fun. I can now say with certainty that I have all of these. My relationship with my wife is stronger than it has ever been.”
— W.D., Bespoke private mentorship
From lifelong premature ejaculation to lasting “as long as I want”
“From my very first sexual experience, I’ve always had MAJOR problems with premature ejaculation. To the point that it’s shaped my ENTIRE LIFE in terms of how far I would let relationships go… My fear of premature ejaculation and the misery caused by it has made me feel like less than a whole man my entire life. … The most helpful thing about your course was learning that I essentially needed to RE TRAIN my nervous system… Through Sexual Self-Mastery I learned to intentionally train my MUSCLE MEMORY and my nervous system. … The other night I had amazing sex with my wife and she said that it was the best sex she’s ever had. THAT WAS HUGE FOR ME. For the first time in my life, my sexual confidence is full and complete. … I can last for a good 10-15 minutes, up to an hour. As long as I want. … I appreciate you for helping me to reclaim my manhood. This was probably the most significant achievement of my adult life…”
— J.T., SSM
Twenty years of sexual frustration undone in nine weeks
“Week 9… What a barrage of WINS… I can get present on demand (before was never present, didn’t even know what present is). This is a game changer! … Experienced non-ejaculatory orgasm (or something that felt like it) twice when making love to my wife … Went from poor-confidence and frustration of love making to 10x confidence and excitement about it. Making love is a source of joy now. You’ve undone 20 years of sexual frustration for me. … Experienced how I can build-up sexual energy over few days and feel energized carrying it. Instead of releasing it with ejaculation and feeling drained, sad, guilty… Identified and eliminated MAJOR limiting beliefs about self and life. … Feel EMPOWERED about my sexuality (before powerless in it). … Found a mentor (YOU) who I can TRUST, look up to and learn from for years to come. … EASILY top 3 $10K I’ve ever spent in terms of ROI.”
— Vlad S., SSM (VIP)
Six months after SSM: porn-free, 3+ hours, and a full-body orgasm without ejaculating
“I’m writing this six months after completing the Evolved Masculine Sexual Self Mastery (SSM) course. … six months after completing SSM, the results of this alchemical work continue to reveal themselves in my life in countless ways. This isn’t a pitch. I’m not selling anything. Destin didn’t ask me to write this. … Mid-way through SSM, I ended my relationship with porn entirely, full stop. My relationship with self-pleasure and ejaculation has changed permanently. And, my business and creative life is expanding in ways that I am incredibly proud of. … I felt myself as an entirely different lover. I lasted as long as I wanted- in this case 3+ hours. … I was confident, assertive, and fully present with her and with myself. … At the end of all this, I experienced a full-body orgasm… So please believe me when I say: This shit works.”
— Anonymous client, SSM
From one orgasm a night to multiple non-ejaculatory orgasms
“Up until a few months ago, I was like most men my age… I was only capable of having one orgasm per night, which coincided with ejaculation. … I read the book The Multi-Orgasmic Man… Although this made sense intellectually, I was never able to translate the wisdom and knowledge from its pages into a lived experience. A few months ago, Destin Gerek offered to coach me in learning how to separate ejaculation from orgasm and master the art of the non-ejaculatory orgasm. It took about 6 weeks for me to cross the threshold and experience my first non-ejaculatory orgasm—in fact, that first night, I had five non-ejaculatory orgasms. … Since then, I’ve had a regular experience of multiple orgasms, which has made sex indescribably more fulfilling. Learning this technique from Destin has been transformative, both sexually and spiritually. … he has a great sense of how to meet men where they’re at.”
— M.T., Private coaching
From toxic relationships and empty casual sex to a deep, healthy partnership
“Two years ago on a coaching course in LA, I met Destin Gerek, at a time in my life when I was a mess in how I was relating to women. … Prior to meeting him, I’d studied and worked with pick-up artists… But Destin was different. He really cared about women. He deeply understood the importance of safety for women, both physical and emotional. … It was a life-changing pleasure to do the equivalent of a PhD in Understanding Women with him during my time as his apprentice. My work with Destin was one of the major components of moving from a place of having loveless or toxic relationships with women, as well as a lot of empty casual sex, to a place of being in an awesome healthy relationship with an incredible woman. A relationship that has real depth of love.”
— Dave M., Private mentorship (apprentice)
From “clueless” and anxious to confident, with real skill in foreplay
“Before the course, if I may paint a picture, I rarely initiated sex with my partner because I just didn’t know what the f— to do and felt clueless. … I can say that that gap has been filled and I actually have a foreplay game now. Her turn-on has become a wave that I have the skills to ride (which is weird to say because I suck at surfing). … I thought at first that if developed better ejaculatory control then I wouldn’t have to be anxious and the rest would fall into place. I was partly right but it was only one piece of the picture. I needed my whole mindset to change. … Cultivating our sex life will be an ongoing practice, but I can absolutely credit this course with bringing me to a higher level of confidence and skill.”
— David F., Erotic Super Powers (ESP)
Deeper presence, confidence and connection with his wife, and a clearer purpose
“I am extremely fortunate and grateful to have been able to experience Destin Gerek’s coaching work, and it has been life-changing. … I’m experiencing a far deeper level of presence, peacefulness and confidence, in my sexual relationship and in my way of living, than I ever knew possible. … Destin’s approach is about making changes from the inside-out, based on what works best for the individual client. His work is very personalized and non-judgmental. … I’ve experienced growth in finding my purpose, subtle energy movement, sexual connection, Tantra practice, cultivating and deepening presence, enhancing my relationship connection with my wife, deepening my self-confidence, and self-expression. I also enrolled in the Orgasmic Mastery course. Thanks to this program, I discovered non-ejaculatory orgasms and male multiple orgasms… this work has blown open the doors of my life!”
— Anonymous client, Private coaching + SSM
Coming back to life after a lifetime of severe trauma
“I wanted to express deep gratitude for the coach that you have been. I see now that I’ve been waiting to really invest in a coach until I found one that I feel could really handle what I would be bringing them. … I have gone thru so many therapists because so many people just didn’t have the skills to really grasp the level of trauma (I now have a great therapist in addition to working with you). So, I want to express my deep gratitude to you for being the angel who didn’t turn away from all the stuff that working with me has come with – I literally feel like I am coming back to life again – like I’ve landed on the shore again after feeling like I was trying to keep afloat in a violent sea – You have given me gifts that are priceless and I am deeply touched…”
— Anonymous client, Private coaching
The most confident and fulfilled he has ever been
“I wanted to tell you that I feel like your work has had a massive positive impact on me. … I trust you’ll be happy to hear that I’m easily in the most confident and fulfilled place I’ve ever been in my life. Many of the issues surrounding my masculinity and discomfort in my own body have dramatically subsided. I feel sexy in the mirror for the first time ever. I feel like I have reached a much greater understanding of women’s needs and desires. … I’ve also been owning my masculine desires so much more in general. I’ve run two half marathons now, and am training for my third and a full marathon in the next few months. I feel as though I could go out into the world and just meet a woman, have a good time and be proud of who I am. I’ve never felt this way before…”
— Richard L., SSM
Lasting as long as he wanted, for the first time
“I met this beautiful woman and we made a heartfelt connection. … The presence exercises really paid off. She could tell I was really there with her. … My confidence from the Sexual Self-Mastery course certainly shined through. I was able to last as long as I wanted and only came when I wanted to (all new experiences for me!). I even tried a bunch of new sexual things that I’d never done before. So, yeah the training is having quite the effect on me and others around me.”
— J.A., SSM
From ego and anxiety around sex to “a calm inner knowing of my sexual value”
“Sexually, it’s night and day different. … My relationship with sex is different, it’s not an identity issue – the ego attachment has been replaced with a calm inner knowing of my sexual value. And this has transformed sex into something relaxing, pleasurable, powerful and fun, without the anxiety, fear, resentment or anger from ego attachment. Lasting as long as I want, experiencing multiple orgasms, expanding her orgasms, communicating honestly, trying new things and having wonderful, powerful, uplifting experiences is “normal” now. … instead of wanting more than anything to BE “that guy” who is a complete master at sex, I’m actually looking forward now to the journey of BECOMING “that guy,” while knowing that the guy I am now, for the women in my life, IS “that guy,” and it’s really not that big of a deal.”
— T.R., SSM
From neediness and a year without dating to relaxed confidence with women
“I’m noticing this healing work I am doing on my sexuality is dramatically changing my interactions with women. I’ve really been cultivating a deep sense of self love and appreciation. From that space my familiar neediness or need for feminine validation has greatly diminished. I have felt way more relaxation in my connections without any agenda or fear of rejection coming up. This is coming from a guy that hasn’t been with a woman in nearly a year and rarely in my life have I ever felt a sense of confidence relating with the opposite sex.”
— L.R., SSM
From lasting 30 seconds to 45 minutes of high arousal
“What did I learn – there is a lot of pleasure at 7 to 8 and briefly touching 9… When I get to this stage of arousal I need to slow back down and take a breather as oppose to continually pushing to that edge. Felt a little disappointed initially at ejaculating again but then reflected once again on how I now get to 45 mins most of which is fairly high arousal and not cumming whereas previously I would have lasted 30 seconds. … I now recommit and love myself for taking this journey, learning the lessons and moving forward.”
— Anonymous client, SSM
More grounded, more present, and a deeper connection his wife can feel
“The Orgasmic Mastery course is working in amazing ways. … My connection with my wife, with the experience, with my energy and with my sexual desire is growing phenomenally. … As I’ve worked on presence and energy flow, my wife has felt the difference and felt more connection in the experience. … I’ve felt more grounded and confident around sex because I can access an intense level of pleasure, satisfaction and bliss on my own, so the NEED for sex is diminished, leaving more room for desire and enjoyment. … I’m actually being instead of doing, it’s really transformed my sex life in amazing ways. … for the first time, I can really FEEL that this is going to happen, that this isn’t some woo-woo thing… but a real way of being.”
— Anonymous client, SSM
From feeling disconnected from his body to being at peace in it
“I was uncertain what to expect or what I would feel when I first signed up to do coaching with you. It has proven to be an amazing experience and I’m only beginning to realize how powerful an effect it will have on my life. It’s been two months since we started, I already feel more grounded in my sexual exploration. It feels like my body and mind are on a journey together to discover my sexuality and desires, rather than feeling my sexuality as totally dissociated from the rest of who I am. I am more at peace with my body, more comfortable looking at myself, more curious about moving and touching my body… being aware of my body rather than living life as a spirit or head dragging along a body.”
— D.T., Private coaching
From heartbreak to a loving relationship, a career taking off, and financial abundance
“I’ve been reflecting on attending the course last summer and the great changes it’s brought to my life when I was in such a confused, vulnerable and honestly just down place in my life… From helping me start to shift my own personal identity around sex, my masculinity and how I want to show up in the world, not only for a lover but to serve the world as a whole. … to being in a new, loving relationship with a beautiful woman that is so life giving and free… much thanks to the inner work I did through your course and learning to show up as a better lover in communication, in sex and in presence. My career has really started to take off and for the first time in my life am starting to find myself in financial abundance… I believe due to learning to harness my sexual energy and power for my own productivity and manifestations”
— Brandon K., SSM
More confidence, and a better relationship with himself and his wife
“Self-exploration was very useful. The understanding that pleasure comes from my own body not from other people. Taking pride and pleasure in my own body. … Practising different levels of arousal and also restraint. It’s ok not to ejaculate and have an orgasm every time. … The training has improved my self-confidence, my knowledge, and my relationship with myself and my wife. I would highly recommend the course!”
— Marc P., SSM
Finally feeling his passion and purpose
“Thank you, Destin. I periodically wonder who and where I’d be were it not for your coaching and laser sharp reflections almost three years ago in Berlin. To finally uncover and FEEL what my passion and purpose is was a gift like no other.”
— Kevin B., Private coaching
A one-day intensive that sparked a bolder plan for his future
“The VIP Full Day Intensive was a truly remarkable adventure of discovery, inner reflection, coaching, pushing limits, feeling my fears and being in my power. … He is open, real and honest in expressing both his truth and reflecting what he sees in me. He effectively blends compassionate listening with a call for action… I look forward to implementing a bolder plan for my future and realizing my visions, with this VIP Full Day Intensive as an exceptional and transformative part of the journey. … I am honored to call you my brother, something I have rarely felt with others.”
— Art B., VIP Day
At 68, the greatest shared lovemaking of his life
“A quick update: the PC exercises, breathing and self exploration are AWESOME!! I have experienced sensations and communicative arousals that are brand new and growing to this 68 year old, and this has also been a major part of the greatest shared love making with my lady love. Please pass on my best to the guys, and that M.V. says this is the real deal of becoming real men.”
— M.V., SSM
An “advanced” lover’s love life upgraded “From A+ to A+++”
“This is a FANTASTIC course!! … Worth every cent! It has expanded my love life in so many ways; far, far beyond my expectations. … And as for results: my sweetie is LOVING it, and I am feeling my love life just light up and EXPLODE in so many great ways. … I’ve always considered myself to be an ‘advanced’ lover and have even explored Taoist sexual practices and energetics for years already. Even having explored these realms before I’m getting so much out of this course! … since I started there ABSOLUTELY has been an enhancement and upgrade in my life! From A+ to A+++…”
— T.G., SSM